It was pissing rain last night so my 5 a-side football match was canceled. With nothing to do me and a friend went to see the film Battle: Los Angeles
Utter abortion of a film - I can't believe nobody realised just how shit it was while they were making it. It had absolutely nothing going for it apart from how laughably terrible it is. Horrific script that was probably just copied and pasted from other disaster films and a narrative that was so untidy you wonder how they stumbled to the "conclusion" they did.
You know how this movie ends before you even buy your ticket, but I won't give it away. All I will say is there's a moment in the movie where it should end (all of the pointless, retarded narrative threads have a possible chance of being tied up at this point) but the director clearly found some money in a drawer somewhere and decided some more shit needed blowing up. So he adds another 45 minutes to this bloated joke of a film.
I wasn't expecting Citizen Kane, but I at least wanted Deep Impact. Truly shocking. 2/10
So I get home at around 11pm and see that The Happening is about to start. Now I had never seen The Happening before but I'd heard how bad is was meant to be, having seen one terrible film I thought what the hell how could this be any worse..........
The worst films I have ever seen, and I've seen Torque. Dialogue was terrible, so many characters who drifted in and out of the story while adding absolutely nothing to it and as for the main characters. This was my face while watching it:
I honestly can't work out what M. Night Shamalamalamalan was trying to do with it. It felt as though he was making a ham-fisted "nature is all-powerful and will beat man when it wants to". What a thunderingly shit film.
1/10 that one point is because you get to look at Zooey Deschanel.
After last night I am truly losing the will to live.
His movies keep getting worse, I can't believe it =\